Saturday, October 22, 2005


to blog about:

Officially, we are getting married in Jamaica, July 1st at 2:30 pm. Anyone who wants to pony up the dough (minus those certain people who know who they are) is welcome to come share this day with us.

Speaking of "us", this morning I had one of those "Things are almost perfect in my life right now" moments. I had to get up for a weekend shift, and when I came back in the apartment to get something, Carly was awake. She had not "made herself up", so she looked really good. (That's something most women don't understand, but those of us who have gotten passed the immature stage of our lives like a woman natural) Anyway, she was in her sleeping clothes and had her glasses on, instead of her contacts. Perfect. AND AND she was baking bread. You just cannot make a moment like that. I was perfectly in love.

And on the other side of the spectrum:

I am a pitbull when a friend gets hurt. Physically, emotionally, doesn't matter. Whoever hurt the friend gets the full focus of my attention until I feel they are square with the universe. Even when the friend forgives, I stay in that moment. It's both a sickness and a cure.

But I am finding it hard this time. The idiot who did the hurting is so messed up it almost seems like I am just piling it on. This person is so wrapped up in a false world, so out of touch with reality (by design) and so lost, I am not sure I can do any more damage. Top that off with the friend seemingly forgiving and forgetting with the patience of Jesus Christ, and I am fast running out of gas to be mad.

Maybe I am getting old. Maybe my life is in a better place, so it is hard for me to stay in a worse one. Maybe I just stopped caring. I just don't know.

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