EXPECTING LIFE

Monday, July 17, 2006

I WANNA RIDE!

We just got our carry-on back from our trip to Jamaica, so pictures will be posted in the next couple of days. Further, our photographer has informed us that the full DVD of her work has been mailed this morning. Expect those pictures a day or two after the first.

And until then, I have a couple things to share.

First, I think I have figured out what it is about my personality that rubs one out of every ten or so people the wrong way. It is honesty, I would like to say. But that is only partially true. I think it is unfiltered, matter-of-fact honesty.

I came to this revelation today when I went to confront one of my bosses about a recent write-up she made about my performance. For the backstory: She wrote up everything I had ever done wrong since being employed with her December '04. The list had 8 things. That, in and of itself, should be a damned commendation of how little I mess up, but it was not. Further, every item on the list had been discussed and fixed since. And one of them was checking email on company time. Seriously. Anyway, I just wanted to see where I stood, as Carly and I have talked about staying here, and doing the overnight work, even though I most likely have a new job (see this blog tomorrow for confirmation or a HUGE rant). I wanted to know if it would be a stable work environment for the next 6-12 months, at which point we fully expect to buy a house.

Her write up was rather matter-of-fact, as well, but when I talked to her she was uncomfortable and waffled. This is a common occurrence with me. I wish I could say it is because I am physically imposing, but at 6 foot 190, I doubt many people cross the street when they see me coming. I had previously decided these 10% were just pussies, and couldn't handle face-to-face, frank discussion. I am sort of right.

Part of the reason, though, is the way I present it. Instead of leaning into it slowly, like most people would, feeling it out, making it easy on the other person, I jump right in. I just said, right out, what is wrong with me, do you think I can fix it, or do you want me to quit. That doesn't offer a lot of latitude, does it? In fact, it right away backs her into a corner. Not very diplomatic. Even though I am being honest, and wearing my heart on my sleeve, and further being no nonsense, I am not getting to the root, and I doubt that approach ever will.

I am not saying this to condemn myself, either. I like this about me. I might point out that most men do, too. It is easier, and at the end of the conversation both sides know where they stand, no excuses. Some women, though, seem to wrankle at this approach. Moreover, they get the wrong impression of my attitude, or intent. They think I am coming in to start a fight or push them around. When really I just want an answer without a lot of discussion.

It was interesting to figure this out today, and I can look out for it in the future. Already, it has applied to a past altercation with a professor (feminist, I should point out). Maybe pointing that out is part of the problem, too.



In happier news, I spent about 150+ miles on a motorcycle yesterday. I did some city driving, in town driving, and even went on the highway for a stretch. It went very well, and I actually felt confidant. Bil, you were right, 500cc would not have been big enough. I was, once again, on my Father-in law's 750. But when I got back to the garage, he had a surprise for me. He had asked Carly if it was ok to sell it to me. She said she felt a lot better about it now, and it was ok. So he offered it to me. 1100 is what he has invested and that's all he wants back. I am going to buy it, I think. Since we are not moving, we can afford a silly purchase like this. And I can still ride for the next few months.

The picture above is not of the actual bike. It is damned close, though. This one has full dress, which I may or may not take off, otherwise they are the same. It is a very nice runner, and was easy to handle/get up to speed, stop. I still have some getting used to on the clutch, but by day's end I was running through town without stalling the damned thing out. One more weekend and I think I can take it back to Bemidji, and the horrid traffic we endure.

Stay tuned for real pics of it (Mike has a compressor, so I might paint it and put some ghost flames on it, who knows) as well as the much anticipated Wedding Pics!

-
| <$BlogCommentDeleteIcon$>